Beauty or the Beast

I have come back to writing again after a long period of lull. The last twenty days or so has brought us face to face with the beast of today, COVID 19. All this while it was a piece of news that came in every moment from all over the world. But we were sure it could not affect us as a family, or so we thought. Then it happened. On a dreadful Saturday evening, as I walked into my father’s room, I was shocked to see him sprawled on the floor, with his eyes wide open and yet unable to get up. With no sense of his bearings, he had not even realized that he was on the floor. The trauma had just started for us. Calling up his doctors and explaining the situation to them, the conclusion was that he had some cardiac or neurological issues. We were to observe him further and if his condition worsened,  to hospitalize him. His condition worsened the next day. We had no choice but to hospitalize him. Even at that moment, there was no remote thought that he could have COVID-19. For a man who had never stepped out of his room for the last nine months, he was safe from COVID we thought. We were proved wrong within a half-hour of his admission to the ER. Shocked and too numb to react for a few seconds, all I could do was type the sentence which read ” Dad has COVID-19”. The trauma had truly begun. Being an acute dementia patient, my father could not comprehend what was going on. All that he saw was, he could not see the faces of the hospital staff. In a flurry of activity and as per government protocol, the hospital shared my father’s credentials with the local authorities and washed their hands off the matter. There were no beds available in the hospital for COVID-19 patients on that day. I was informed to try getting him admitted at some other hospital or come back the next day. By this time dad was in a state of panic. Running from pillar to post and up and down the hospital floors, I just pleaded with all concerned, to get him admitted. When I was almost losing hope, a bed was made available. The Doctors moved him to the designated floor and shut the doors in front of us. For the very first time in his life, he was in the hospital alone. All we could do was, await the daily telephonic updates from the medical team. Dad stayed there for a week. When he came out, he was a changed man. He had changed physically and mentally. Physically, the disease and reduced him to a thin layer of skin covering his bones. Mentally, his dementia had worsened manifold. He was now oblivious to his surroundings. It seemed  COVID-19  had landed a killer punch on my father. In the week that he has come home, he had forgotten to eat on his own. He needs toilet training almost every day. He is unable to stand or walk without assistance. Everything had turned upside down for us. We needed to turn ourselves to caregivers, all of a sudden. The days ahead are very unclear. Today morning sitting alone, I was sifting through my photo collection and glanced upon theses pictures. These flowers have been growing every year at home for almost a decade now. Looking closely, I realized that the structure almost resembles the Corona Virus image. Known as scadoxus multiflorus, this is a Lilly flower, widely found in sub-Saharan Africa and is naturalized in Mexico. It is beautiful to look at but is poisonous by nature. I just wondered it was so similar to the glitzy corporate hospital, all bright and beautiful on the outside. But extremely painful on the inside. They are painful by their attitudes and apathy. Our experience has taught us one thing. No one is safe now. Take all the precautions you can. This disease can either kill or destroy your normal life-ALTOGETHER.